Breaking me
Wednesday, February 8, 2017
A flashback. I begin looking back on all the things, all the words I used to make me up, and guess what.. they are always the same.
Hurt. Save me from myself. Help. Strong. Weak. Get up. Help. I'll be fine. No I wont be. I'm lost. Forgiveness. Help. I will pick me up.
If you can put me in a jar of nouns and verbs, I think the above put me in a safe zone. Sometimes I feel unstoppable. Sometimes I feel lost. And sometimes I can rule the world, and then it breaks me into pieces. Call it fireworks. Or call it a disaster I don't care. All I know is... when all the stars have crashed in my galaxy, at this very stage I have lost my ground. Gravity is against me.
I actually do not how to feel. What to feel. Or what I am actually feeling.
You will never hear the words I want to say. I will bury them in my ground for I have lost.
You will never hear me cry. I will wipe the tears away in my sleep for I have craved.
You will never hear me laugh. I will hide it in my smile for I have fronted.
You will never see me be myself. Even if you think you do, maybe you will never really know. If that is me, or that is me.
I am strong for I've no strength left.
I am weak for I've left nothing.
I am fine for I've got to be.
No one can break me.
Except me breaking me, breaks me.
